Pets and the Freaks that Own Them

I am not a lover of animals. I don't want them to suffer, but I personally don't need them in my life. I think horses are cool but expensive. Cats are useless. Dogs for the most part aren't bad when cared for by somebody else. They just need to be kept in appropriate areas, like a cage, fence, house, etc.

Everything changes when dog owners are in public places with their delightful companions. I'm fairly certain dogs can sense that I don't like them. Why else would the following scene happen dozens of times?

While out enjoying nature and that wonderful warming that the earth is currently going through, off in the distance a dog approaches. The dog's owner is further away, strangely holding a leash that is not connected to the dog. The beast races towards me, barking, growling, drooling; angry eyes and all. Usually my path is blocked by the half-bear, half-wolf. The dog owner shows up a minute letter, expressing shock and surprise that their angel dog could somehow cause concern for anybody. "Oh, Snaggletooth won't hurt you. He's really quite friendly and harmless. I think he likes you." As I struggle to move past the beast, my cussing is drowned out by the incessant barking.

For years I've wondered what I could do or say to let the freak know he needs to be more responsible with his little angel/beast. Is it too much to expect dog owners to keep their dogs under control out in public? I keep a leash on my kids when we all leave the house. Why can't they do the same with their dogs?

I decided to attend one of those home Taser parties that are all the rage with the neighborhood ladies. Sure, I was the only male in attendance. Yes, they all intend to use their Tasers on would-be human attackers. Why can't I use my Taser on the next pit bull that gets in front of me while jogging? I'm sure it would stun the dog enough to allow me to get away without wetting myself - and might teach the freak owner to be more responsible. I don't think a stun would kill some of the larger breeds. If I happen to be attacked by a poodle next time out - well, that's a chance I may have to take.